Chat Up Lines By County


BEFORE the days of dating apps, young men around the country had to rely on cheesy chat-up lines to break the ice with whoever they were trying to talk into the back seat of their mother’s car.

These lines differed from county to county, and we’ve collated the best here:

Antrim- “Girl, you look hotter than an PSNI Land Rover at a Republican riot”.

Armagh- “How about you and me smuggle ourselves outta here?”

Carlow- “How Car-low can you go, baby? Standards wise, I mean”.

Cavan- “Here’s the loan of 20c, call your mother and tell her you’re not coming home”.

Clare- “My name’s not Cliff, but I can offer you Moher”.

Cork- “Let’s get together to spite the Dubs, somehow”.

Derry- “Real quick; what’s the name of the city we’re standing in right now?”

Donegal- “Shit here, isn’t it?”

Down- “What’s up?”

Dublin- “Listen, neither one of us can afford the rent around here so what do you say, want to pair up?”.

Fermanagh- “You’re Enniskillin’ it, baby”.

Galway- “Got a light?”

Kerry- “Listen, my uncle is a TD, he can get you any road you want fixed like that“.

Kildare- “The county is Lily white, but your wedding dress won’t be after tonight”.

Kilkenny- “Ok, real quick, your all-time all-star hurling line-up, go!”

Laois- “Wanna Strad-dle my Bally?”

Leitrim- “You’re name is Shannon? Well wouldn’t you know, my name’s Carrick”.

Limerick- “I’m such a weapon, Claire Daly & Mick Wallace object to me being in the county”.

Longford- “Is your Uncle Declan Mahon? Just checking if we’re second cousins. Not that it’s a dealbreaker, mind you”.

Louth- “Nothing wee about my county, that’s for sure”.

Mayo- “Are you the All-Ireland? Because I’ve got a real good feeling about you this year”.

Meath- “Navan is spelled the same forwards and backwards so feel free to fuck me six ways from Sunday”.

Monaghan- “There’s not mushroom in here, let’s go to my place”.

Offaly- “I know we’re in Birr but there’s no need to be so cold to me”.

Roscommon- “You’re bringing me to the Boyle, love”.

Sligo- “Nice legs. What time is mass in the morning?”

Tipperary- “Oh, it’s a long way alright, if ya know what I mean. Like, very long”

Tyrone- “Did you kidnap our GAA manager? Or have you just stolen my Harte?”

Waterford- “How do you like your blaa in the morning?”

Westmeath- “You’ll do”.

Wexford- “Let’s make this quick, I have to be up early to go sell strawberries on the N7 in the morning”.

Wicklow- “We’ve a lot in common, you and me. We’re both Dubs who couldn’t afford to live in the city so here we are in fucking Bray”.