Don’t Let This AI Article Business Distract From the Fact That You All Wear Way Too Much Fake Tan


A CONTENTIOUS article about the use of tanning products published by the Irish Times was revealed at the weekend to be an AI-generated ramble submitted by an online trollster, with the intention of highlighting the media’s eagerness for divisive rage-click content.

And as the conversation swings towards the use of AI and what this means for debate going forward, one detail is in danger of getting lost in the shuffle- the fact that some of you are going around looking more orange than the 12th of July.

“Yes, the article was designed to be overly-woke clickbait and yes, one of the so-called ‘prestigious’ Irish newspapers posted it in full knowledge that it would provoke an angry online response leading to a massive spike in traffic.

But that doesn’t take away from the fact that Siobhan over here has gone full Oompa Loompa for her cousin’s 30th,” stated one commentator, trying to be heard amid the ‘artificial intelligence is going to eat our children’ debate.

“These things aren’t mutually exclusive,” argued another. “You can think that it’s a disgrace that a newspaper would be so blind in their hunt for reach and interaction that they wouldn’t think to do even the most cursory of checks on the author, and also think that Coppers on a night out looks like the finals of a Donald Trump lookalike competition”.

As calls to recognise the Dan Bar-ification of Irish women went unheeded, many have stated that the whole incident is all the proof they need to never trust a word the media say ever again, unless it’s something they agree with in the first place.

“If it’s something I don’t believe in, then I’m going to accuse it of being AI-generated woke bullshit from now on,” said one avatar-less Twitter user today, before adding that they don’t mind the look of fake tan, but they can’t stand the wet Marla smell of it.