Cost Of Waterford North Quays Doubles After Glitzy Sod Turning Ceremony

DEVELOPERS of the North Quays in Waterford have revealed today that the total cost of the project has already doubled following a glitzy sod turning ceremony yesterday afternoon, WWN has learned.

BAM, who are also responsible for constructing one of the world’s most expensive public buildings, the Children’s Hospital, confirmed that yesterday’s lavish opening involving the Taoiseach Leo Varadkar, Ministers Eamon Ryan and Darragh O’Brien alongside local politicians added an extra 200mn euros to the overall budget and couldn’t guarantee this will be the final figure once completed.

“We had to stage a mound of dirt for the politicians to pretend to turn a sod along with the hiring of our own crane and two jack hammers,” a spokesperson for the Dutch owned construction firm explained the sudden hike, “that and the couple of shovels we provided, the marquee and few chairs came in at 180 million, then when you add tax and a developer fee it’s over 200 mill, but don’t quote us on that as material costs could bring that up further – this could end up coming in at 3 billion”.

The North Quays was initially expected to cost €170mn and will involve the greatest urban regeneration ever attempted in Waterford since the local council erected new phone boxes no one uses except for advertising companies to plaster ads of over-priced products on.

“We will build a 15-storey hotel and conference centre, twin blocks of office space rising to seven storeys, 300 apartments in five structures varying between seven to 17 stories in height as well as a major open public amenity space – Jesus Christ! Hold on, that seems very cheap now I think about it!” the BAM spokesperson added, before frantically calling accounts to once again recalculate their fees.