Local Woman Wouldn’t Have Married Husband If She’d Known How Loud He Typed

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“I suppose this is what they meant by ‘for better or worse'” sighed Waterford woman Erin Sheerin, trying her best to get a bit of her own work done by blocking out the noise of her husband Dylan hammering at his computer keyboard like it owed him money.

“But I swear, if I’d known that five years after we got married we’d be working from home together and I’d have to listen to him typing for six hours a day, I’d have ran screaming down the aisle, out into the car and away to a new life with someone who can type like a normal person”.

The Sheerin family are just one couple who have had to seek marriage guidance in a Covid-19 world, as work-from-home set-ups expose spouses to personality traits that they had never witnessed before; the most common of which being excessively loud typing.

“It’s like listening to a cow pissing on a wet road” sobbed Mrs. Sheerin, as her husband pounded out another email.

“Listen to me type – see? You can barely hear it. Now listen to his – it sounds like a fucking landslide. Is that what his office was like on a normal day? A hundred people clattering away like that? Or do I just have the one husband who either can’t type quietly or is so much of a prick that he doesn’t care? Either way, this wedding ring never felt heavier”.

Mr. Sheerin was unavailable for comment as he was typing a particularly angry email, raising the decibel level in the house to roadworks levels of noise.

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