Dublin Sick Of Carrying Rest Of Country On Its Back
DUBLINERS emerged today to hold an emergency press conference expressing their desire for the rest of the county to buck up its idea and start helping out around here.
“We pay most of the income tax, corporation tax, you name it we’re the ones carrying you workshy, low income bastards on our shoulders and it’s starting to wear thin,” Dubliners said in their trademark humble tone.
“We know you’re up that one day in December for the shopping but you need to do more lads. Don’t start banging on about ‘we feed the country’, we have farmers too,” added Dubliners in conciliatory fashion.
News that Dublin has grown tired of carrying the rest of the country on its back has not come as shock to surrounding counties.
“Thanks for the reminder, you hadn’t mentioned how important you think you are there for about 30 seconds. Nearly forgot,” chimed in one non-Dublin Irish person as they walked away from the press conference muttering under their breath.
As the lack of government policy in regards to just about everything sees Dublin further filled to the brim with the lion’s share of jobs, investment and initiatives, there is a growing feeling that the rest of country should do more to alleviate its reliance on the beating economic heart of Ireland.
“We never give you anything and actively encourage companies not to bother debasing themselves by setting up down the sticks, but that’s no excuse for why you’re not carrying your fair share of the burden,” one spokesperson for the Department of Posing For Job Announcement Photo Opportunities In Dublin That Have Nothing To Do With The Government.