Local Man Falsely Claiming He’s Over 6 Foot Tall

ONE WATERFORD man has hit new heights when it comes to maintaining a long standing lie no matter the circumstances, as he continues to falsely claim he is over 6 feet tall.

Declan Toland (34) has maintained the lie that he is 6 foot 2 inches tall for close to 16 years now and an investigation carried out by WWN suggests there is no sign of him coming clean any time soon.

“About 6-2,” Toland has most frequently and casually stated when asked what height he is, in the belief that women are much more impressed by a more elongated man. The Dungarvan based painter and decorator settled on 6 feet 2 inches being his completely made up height after deciding that if he said he was just one inch above the 6 foot barrier people would become suspicious.

He also maintains a near encyclopedic knowledge of famous people who are 6 foot 2 inches tall so he can let people know he is the same height as them if they ever come up in conversation.

Increasingly finding ways to bring his superior height into conversation when around women he wants to impress, Toland, who is single, is so far down the rabbit hole of his lie that he is no longer aware of his actual, real height.

“Declan, bless him, he’s about 5 foot 10 I’d say. No harm in it. In fact it’s above average. I’m 6 foot 2 so there’s an obvious enough difference in height between us but when I broached it with him once, he got very touchy,” confirmed long time friend of Toland’s Gary Custerly.

In a bid to maintain the lie he lives Toland is careful to never stand back to back with Custerly and has promised himself he will immediately leave a room if it has a measuring tape in it.