Mayo Fan Unable To Say Anything Except ‘Mayo For Sam’ Admitted To Hospital

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A DISORIENTATED Mayo supporter has been admitted to the Mater hospital after being found wandering the streets of Dublin muttering ‘Mayo For Sam’ over and over again in a continuous loop.

The yet unnamed fan, who was discovered with nine ham sandwiches in his pockets and no ID, is said to be in a stable condition this morning, but seems to be quite unable to form any sentence other than ‘Mayo For Sam’, the mantra of Mayo GAA supporters since they last won the championship in 1951.

Mayo supporters descended on Dublin yesterday to witness their team’s All-Ireland semi-final clash against Kerry, which ended in a draw despite Mayo opening a commanding lead in the first half, which doctors at the Mater hospital believe may be the root of their patient’s current condition.

“There’s only so much disappointment the human mind can cope with before it crashes,” said Dr. Maharaveeesh O’Malley, head of football-related complaints in the Mater.

“Our subject seems to have just cracked up, and is unable to cope with watching his team come so near to winning, and then fall at the last hurdle, over and over again.

“We’re doing our best to coax him out of his current state, and we have hooked him up to a Club Orange IV drip in a bid to help snap him out of it”.

Mayo face Kerry in a replay this Saturday, with Mayo fans of a sensitive disposition being advised to stay well clear of Croke Park if they cherish their own sanity.

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