Judge Appointment Could Bring Down Government Where 987 Real Scandals Have Failed


MANY members of the public have expressed their surprise at the continued fallout from the appointment of Marie Whelan to the Court of Appeal and the implication that the controversy could bring down the government.

“Funny that, I had always imagined an actual real scandal would bring down this take-the-piss Dáil,” shared one member of the public, Eoin Keneally, who admitted to being able to recite, from memory, at least 400 scandals that he saw as more troubling.

“I mean, you’ve got the time when the Taoiseach sent someone to basically tell the Garda Commissioner to resign, then there’s the 253 fuck ups in the Guards that has followed since. The health service mess, the 8th Amendment mess, the housing crisis mess, there’s a few hundred more, but look I understand I’m no expert, I’m just a normal citizen so I guess this Judge thing is the big one,” added Keneally before drawing some much needed breath.

With reports in the Irish Independent indicating that several cabinet ministers are worried that Fianna Fáil will pull the plug on the government, the public remains surprised at the development and utter contempt opposition parties have for the appointment.

“Oh right, so it’s not the abuse, neglect and deaths of children in State care then? Shit, I had that one in my office betting pool. Don’t think anyone had ‘someone being appointed as a judge’ if I remember correctly,” explained citizen of Ireland, Vicky Grossan.

Despite intense exchanges between Taosieach Varadkar and Fianna Fáil leader Micheál Martin in the Dáil this week, the public confirmed it was bemused by the fuss and could have sworn the government should have been brought down long ago over effectual policies that are adversely affecting thousands of people.

“I’ve to baptise my child just to get him into a good school, but yeah, by all means shite away in the Dáil about this appointment like it’s the only political problem grave enough to bring down a minority government which is doing fuck all,” added calm parent and member of the public Gary Drummond.