Touching Moment Police Present Tear Gas To Native Americans For Thanksgiving

Facebook Share Share
Twitter Share
Flipboard Share
Reddit Share
SHARES

NORTH Dakota Policemen have been praised for offering Native American Indians several hundred litres of tear gas in an emotional ceremony at Standing Rock this afternoon.

Keeping with the American celebration of the blessings of the harvest, Police officers lined up in a show of solidarity with their Sioux brother and offered up the lachrymatory agent to their welcoming faces, keeping with an age-old tradition spanning back centuries.

“Obviously everyone here is very emotional right now,” Police officer Todd Chamberson explains, “The natives here at the reservation are openly weeping at our kind  hearted gesture. I just wish the rest of the world could get on like we do and live in harmony with one another”.

Standing Rock reservation resident Abedabun Yazzie was so overwhelmed with the touching gift, he was stuck for words.

“Oh my fucking eyes! Help me, help me, I can’t see. It’s burning me. My eyes, I can’t see,” he thanked, before accepting more tear gas, “Argh, my skin feels like it’s on fire. Why are you doing this to us. Leave our land alone. My fucking eyes”.

Celebrations at the ancient Indian site are expected to last right on into the New Year, with even more policemen and women expected to arrive with more gifts throughout the Christmas period.

“It’s great to see everyone so involved,” added officer Chamberson, “Only problem we have now is that the local people are now pretending to be Indians too. I just hope we have enough tear gas to go round”.

ONE MORE THING: Like what WWN does and think Satire (known in Ireland as 'taking the piss') is worth supporting as we face the threat of legal action, the permanently offended and 'Big Tech'?

We're not arrogant enough to think we make the world a better place (that's the job of megalomaniacal dictators) but a small contribution of €5/$5 a month from readers can enable us to keep doing what we're doing, and what's more is we'll give exclusive bonus content and offers to our supporters.

WWN's least favourite phrase in the English language is 'they only love you when you're gone' so help keep us going if you can.

Signing up is easy and done HERE.
Comments ( 1 )
Share what you think.
Facebook Share Share
Twitter Share
Flipboard Share
Reddit Share