Micheál Martin Invites Stephen Donnelly To Join The Dark Side


Following TD Stephen Donnelly’s decision to leave the nascent Social Democrats party, Fianna Fáil leader Micheál Martin has been quick to make a tempting offer.

“Come, my child, to the dark side where we get things done,” Martin is believed to have intoned from a shadowy corner of Leinster House shortly after news of Donnelly’s departure reached him.

Donnelly made the decision to leave his party after much thought and it is rumoured he disagreed with his former joint-leaders of the party, Catherine Murphy and Róisín Shortall when it came to the recent EU ruling in the Apple tax case.

“We could use a man of your principles in this party, if you are first, willing to disregard all of them,” Martin whispered as he later appeared in a fever dream to the Wicklow TD.

“Step away from the light and closer to me. We have speaking rights and will be pulling the plug on the government so it suits us strategically,” Martin, dressed in a floor length black cloak concluded.

Donnelly has not ruled out moving to another party, however, Fianna Fáil have been very open about how much they enjoy devouring the souls of hopeful TDs who want to make a difference.