Government Hold Ceremony Marking 2000th Homeless Child In Dublin

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THE government has laid on a lavish ceremony and banquet in Dublin Castle to mark the milestone of the 2000th homeless child in Dublin, WWN can report.

As solutions to the housing crisis are drafted and property developers lick their lips, many families have been left in limbo, shoved away in hostels, B&Bs and hotels and while the government admits it is regrettable, they confess they were overdue a big fancy slap up meal in Dublin Castle.

“God, it’s been a while, so yes, we know 2000th isn’t a good number. But it is one of those numbers that sounds impressive, one that sounds like a number you would think worthy of celebrating were it not attached to such a sad situation,” chief banquet organiser for the government Eoin Kilmannigan explained to WWN.

The lucky child will be given his own special set of empty promises which will be put together by the local housing authority in the coming days. He will also be placed at the top of the list for a brand new house which is slated for completion something after the Sun burns up.

“He’s one lucky boy, empty promises with his own name written on them, not many people get them. We usually reserve them for someone who is part of redress scheme,” a government spokesperson explained.

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