Leaving Cert Student Getting Close To Never Doing Another Sum In His Life

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IT’S only a matter of hours before one Leaving Certificate student has completed the last piece of mathematics he’ll ever do in his life, WWN can exclusively reveal.

Tramore native Sean Coughlan, 17, is currently sitting Maths Paper 2 before the youngster can put numbers and arithmetic behind him for good.

Coughlan, more a fan of languages, has been doing increasingly difficult sums since before he can remember. Although fully accepting that a core knowledge of how to add things up is essential in society, he has been at peace with the fact that integers have no place in his future plans.

However, the education system dictates that students such as Coughlan need to be force-taught subjects that they have no love or aptitude for, until such a time as their natural dislike for it has become a deep hatred.

“I’m fairly certain that at no stage in my life will I ever be forced to determine the angle of a fucking rhombus,” said Coughlan, who had to study for six months to take a test in a subject that he absolutely hates.

“I could have been studying for things that I do want to pursue, but no… my time was better spent working with imaginary numbers. Imaginary. Fucking. Numbers”.

Coughlan has confirmed to WWN that he will celebrate the completion of Maths Paper 2 by throwing an abacus into a skip.

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