Elderly Couple Still Doing It

WWN has learned of a disturbing incident involving an elderly Waterford couple and a healthy sex life.

Nora and Ian Smith, both 69, stand accused of regularly having sex despite being passed the age where it doesn’t disturb society when they are forced to picture the act itself.

“A couple. Married for over 40 years, still sexing each other in the genitals, frankly, it’s disgusting and should be outlawed,” shared neighbour of the Smiths, Liam Gorey before vomiting.

What makes this unpalatable case even more objectionable is the news that both Nora and Ian remain unapologetic about the fact they still bump uglies.

“We were going at it hammer and tongs this morning, so what? At our age you have to strike whenever the mood takes you,” explained Nora.

The couple claim to love each other dearly and admit their sex life is very intimate, further offending decent members of society who have the good sense to know sex is something for young and beautiful people.

“We were redrafting our wills the other day, and something began stirring in me. At first I thought it was a bowel movement but next thing I knew we were riding on the stair lift,” Ian confirmed in regrettably detailed fashion.

While riding into your lates 60s is not illegal, it really should be.