Country To Run Far Better Without Government In Place


POLITICAL experts have confirmed what most of the Nation has suspected for a long time, the running of the country is to become infinitely more efficient now that there is no government in place.

“While we technically have a caretaker government in place, their role is largely reduced and it is left to many senior civil servants to get things done,” confirmed David Fallon, lecturer in politics in TCD.

“Despite their bad reputation, civil servants are actually good at their jobs, provided they don’t have a number of aimless politicians standing over their shoulder, asking them to carry out ridiculous policies all in the name of misguided ideology,” Fallon added.

The expert testimony of political experts has been echoed by civil servants themselves.

“I cleared 7 years worth of work backlog this morning. I’ve not been asked once to look into some pointless local matter for ministers,” shared senior civil servant Cyril Sergeant.

“I’m going to grab a bit of lunch in a while, but after that, I’ll see if I can sort out the allocations of flood relief funds, homelessness funds and by the time I clock off it’ll almost be like that pack of eejits weren’t in charge for the last 5 years at all,” Sergeant concluded.

It is expected that while politicians have little first hand interaction with the apparatus of the State, Ireland and the quality of life enjoyed by its citizens can only continue to improve.