Maurice Pratt Finally Arrested Over Traumatic Back To School Adverts


FOUR Gardaí were injured today following the arrest of businessman Maurice Pratt after he resisted and assaulted officers with what is believed to be an old Quinnsworth sign.

Mr. Pratt, who is wanted for the crimes against humanity relating to a barrage of traumatic back-to-school adverts in the late 80s and early 90s, was reportedly pepper sprayed by Gardaí in a bid to subdue him.

Acting on a warrant issued by a High Court judge last Friday, members of the Garda rapid response team stormed Mr. Pratt’s Foxrock home at 8am, only to find him waiting with a large metal Quinnsworth sign.

“Mr. Pratt shouted that he would not come alive and started swinging the sign at us,” recalled Garda Mark Richards. “He knocked out four of our men and ran to the back of the premises.

“He then started shouting stuff like ‘That’s right kids; it’s back to school time’, forcing many of us to retreat. Luckily, many of the officers were too young to remember the adverts and managed to arrest him.”

Ambulance crews arrived on the scene shortly after the incident to treat the injured gardaí.

“The four lads seem to be fine, but it’s the ones that were forced to remember the adverts from their youth that I’m worried about,” added Richards. “It will take a long time for those emotional scars to heal, but at least Pratt is finally in custody.”

Maurice Pratt was charged with 12 counts of crimes against humanity and is expected to stand trial later this year. Over 3mn adults are said to suffer post-traumatic stress syndrome due to his Quinnsworth back to school adverts that aired over 30 years ago, leaving many adults today suffering from anxiety issues, causing alcohol and drug addiction.