7 Problems Only A Racist Will Understand


WWN knows that there are certain things you just can’t explain as a racist to those who aren’t racist. They totes don’t get it! There are classic everyday problems that mean sometimes you can’t even. So if you’re racist these problems are absolutely something you will totally identify with.

1) Did you leave your house keys back in the office? Ah, those feckin’ Nigerians!

2) So you’re just minding your business and then out of nowhere someone with a different ethnic background to you just gets all up in your face with their polite living of their own life. Hey, you’re trying to mind your own business here, but they’re getting all up your racist grill.

3) That awkward moment you check out your ancestry on an online website and by God the nerves are going 90. The old near debilitating anxiety that comes with hoping somewhere down the lineage, someone didn’t lose the head and fall in love with someone who wasn’t 100% white. Imagine finding out that you had a racially diverse background. Eh, no thanks we don’t need that drama.

4) Walking your child to school seems like just about the most harmless thing you can do, but we always encounter that age old problem of what to do when you see a black person on the path in front of you and your child. Having to cross the path to avoid them might seem fairly innocuous, but when added up over the course of a lifetime you are literally walking thousand of miles more than you should which takes years off your life.

5) Talking on the phone to strangers can be hard when they have an ambiguous accent. Are they foreign? Are they Indian? Should I conduct this phone call with a smug sense of superiority and disdain? We just don’t know sometimes!

6) Parenting when racist is tough. There is no bigger problem faced than when your child befriends another child who happens to be from a different ethnic background. Try as you might to convince him/her of the evils of someone who is seemingly different to you, children are typically idiots and just can’t understand what all the fuss is about.

7) It’s like every nightmare job interview ever, but it still doesn’t get any easier. You apply for a job, but it is given to a more qualified person with ten years more experience than you all because they’re Asian. Typical.