Set Ronan Mullen Free By Registering To Vote In Seanad Elections

NOW is your chance to set Ronan Mullen free by registering for the Seanad elections. If you attended NUI you can register HERE.

Sources close but not too close to Mullen have confirmed that he no longer wishes to accept taxpayers money in the form of his €66,940 Seanad salary and if you register HERE by the end of today, the 26th of February, you can set him free by giving him the ultimate gift of voting for someone else.

“I know he looks like he enjoys saying mental health isn’t a real thing, how gay people shouldn’t be allowed to marry and encouraging people to harass women, he considers destined for Hell, as they enter hospitals to obtain an abortion but it takes its toll. Please, set him free,” confirmed one increasingly distant source.

Too proud to outright ask NUI graduates to register HERE and oust him as a Senator, Mullen is facing the possibility of yet more years of consistently opposing things, caging himself in an attritional process which risks eroding away at his very soul.

“Ronan is a beautiful bird, and like all beautiful birds he is desperate to fly. We can help him fly away by voting for someone else in the Seanad elections but if we don’t we’re sentencing Ronan to years of sounding like a terrible human being by asserting women would fake suicidal tendencies just to get an abortion,” added the source.

“You don’t honestly think he wants to do this, do you? It’s just people keep voting him in, you can end his misery by registering HERE,” explained the source, someone how having the ability to highlight a web link to a website.