Fully Grown Man Still Buttering Digestive Biscuits

A COUNTY Carlow man is reportedly still buttering digestive biscuits, despite being 43-years-old.

Karl Tobin admitted to the fad during his lunch hour today, when work colleagues spotted the age-old biscuit sandwich in his hand.

“They were soggy too,” Deirdre from accounts pointed out, who shared the canteen table with Karl. “He got all embarrassed when we asked what they were, but we couldn’t help but laugh when he told us”.

In a mumbling tone, Mr. Tobin claimed he had “fuck all else in the cupboard”, so he had no choice but to”butter a few digestives for work”.

Unable to comprehend such a move, his colleagues gathered around the rural employee in jest, uprooting childhood memories of bullying in Karl’s frontal lobes.

“So fucking what if I do, you cunts!” he barked, his colleagues shocked faces forcing him to lower his tone. “Ha-ha, I mean, so what, I like them buttered, big deal. At least I’m not like Tina over there with her gluten fucking free everything”.

With that, the attention was successfully deflected to Tina, who was now being openly laughed at by everyone, allowing Karl to bite into his soggy lunch.

“We’ll see how everyone is when I throw a cup of piss in the water fountain later,” he then told himself. “We’ll see how funny they are then”.