Irish People Urged Not To Look Up Digitised 19th Century Census Records As ‘Countless People Married To Their Cousin’

IRISH people have been strongly advised against searching a treasure trove of newly digitised records which include 19th century censuses and in some cases documents that stretch back over 700 years ago.

“It’s all fun and games until you turn to the wife and ask why she never told you she had the same great-grandfather as you did,” warned genealogist Eanna Colgan, as Irish people descended on online records, once thought to be lost entirely in 1922 Four Courts fire, in the hope of better understanding their family tree.

“In truth I didn’t need to search these records to know my wife Adele was my cousin,” explained local man Paul Carthy, father to a three-eyed son.

“This must be why I always struggle with their/there and can never remember capital cities, it’s because my family tree is actually a circle,” expressed another Irish person, slightly relieved.

Others have welcomed the furnishing of records as they see it as a pathway to end longstanding familial debates.

“A-ha! Brilliant, I found a will here from 1813 which conclusively disproves my Dad’s story about how we were once rich until an uncle drank it all away. Turns out we were always poor, take that Dad!” confirmed one enthusiastic records searcher.

Some groups are staunchly opposed to the work of the Virtual Record Treasury of Ireland.

“This economy survives on yanks coming over here thinking they’re Irish, but if you give them access to a searchable portal that tells them there’s no trace of their great-great-great-great-great-grandfather Flatcap O’Murphygillicoolicaun because he never existed then the tourism industry is fucked,” confirmed Fáilte Ireland.

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