Irish Mother Fitted With 20-Foot-Long Arm For Reading Text Messages

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IRISH mother Anne Drummond has gone to great lengths, roughly 20 feet, after unveiling a specially commissioned ‘mega-arm’ which enables her to keep her phone at such a distance that it reduces eye strain while she still barely makes out the content on her phone screen.

Commissioning a Japanese robotics company to build the €1mn long arm came about after her children pleaded with the 56-year-old to pop down to Specsavers for a checkup as she might be slightly long-sighted.

“Not at all; phone screens are just too small these days and are only designed for teenagers,” replied Drummond, desperately squinting at what looked like her daughter on Facetime.

“Sure, you wouldn’t even notice this bionic arm,” added Drummond, knocking over a house plant with her metal elbow, startling her cat Jude who now began hissing at her mechanical arm in terror.

Drummond, who remortgaged the family home to fund her upgrade, swears by the device which only needs recharging 5 times a day.

“Okay, I know I plugged it in somewhere downstairs,” Drummond said as looked for her charging arm, a now common ritual since her purchase, “I might need to get a bigger one so I can see where it is – why do they make everything so small these days?”

While she should have gone to Specsavers, Anne Drummond has confirmed she is now giving up communicating through the medium of text messaging and has asked if friends and family members could just call into her for a chat instead.

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