US Calls For Gaza Ceasefire To Allow Time To Manufacture More Weapons To Sell Israel

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DESPERATELY trying to keep up with Israel’s demand for weapons to annihilate the Palestinian people, the US has graciously asked for a ceasefire for a few weeks to allow for the manufacturing process.

US Vice President Kamala Harris has demanded that Hamas agree to an immediate six-week ceasefire, if any of them are left, and politely urged Israel to act like it’s giving aid to Gaza without murdering people in cold blood before rolling over them in tanks again.

“Seriously, our arms factories are stretched with the demand from all the world conflicts we’ve started and our contractors are struggling to produce all these freedom makers so give them a chance to catch up,” Harris explained, apologising to customers on behalf of Lockheed Martin and Boeing whose profits have soared in recent years thanks to US foreign policy, “we’d like to profusely apologise to Mr. Netanyahu and all of our customers abroad for the delay, but producing weapons of mass destruction takes time; why not use some white phosphorus in the interim – we won’t mind”.

With fears that hundreds of thousands of Palestinians may still survive Israel’s ongoing genocide, the starvation of the remaining Palestinian survivors is now the Zionists best hope of resurrecting those killed in October and securing the safe return of any remaining Israeli hostages.

“Killing 30,000, mostly innocent women and children, is guaranteed to never come back to bite us on the arse” an IDF source said explaining his reasoning, before casually blowing off a child’s head with his sniper rifle.

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