“We’re Bankrupt” Revenue Hits Santa With Massive Toy Import Tax Bill
FINNISH toy manufacturer and distributor Santa Claus Inc has gone into receivership today after being hit with a huge import tax bill, WWN has learned.
Spokesman and CEO Santa Claus has stated he was given just 7 days to pay arrears of over two trillion dollars in VAT on goods he imported over a 300-year period.
“We’re fucked,” Mr Claus briefed staff at his Lapland headquarters in Finland earlier, “we’re bankrupt, Revenue have taken our deer and will be back for the rest of our assets in the morning if we don’t pony up”.
Trading as a global operation since the late 1700s, Santa Inc will now be handed over to a board of receivers in a bid to salvage the company and keep at least 20% of its workforce.
“Free toys will obviously be the first thing we scrap,” a source said, “we’re also going to move operations to Bangladesh to keep costs down”.
It is understood that Mr Claus will also face legal proceedings and could receive 5-10 years in prison for tax evasion.