Calls Grow For Limerick To Be Split Into Two Teams


FOLLOWING a commanding second half performance against Galway, Limerick’s hurlers are on course to win a historic four-in-a-row.

However, while the county’s people expected warm wishes and congratulations on advancing to yet another final they have instead been met with bitter hostility previously only reserved for child murderers and more understandably, Dublin’s footballers.

“North Limerick and South Limerick and Aaron Gillane is allowed on neither of them, it just makes sense,” remarked one GAA neutral from the neutral county of Waterford, “actually add in West and East Limericks too just to be safe”.

“They wouldn’t have the success without the financial doping from their moneybags billionaire benefactor,” added a bias-free Cork man.

“Over a million people in the fucking place, no wonder they’re way out in front, the Jackeen bastards” offered a Mayo woman, perhaps talking about something else.

Waterford natives have confirmed that the issue of an unstoppable Limerick must be solved immediately as secretly supporting Kilkenny in the upcoming final was doing ‘untold psychological damage’ to the county’s residents.

“It’s only fair money should be made available to Kilkenny so they can clone Eoin Murphy, with 7 or 8 Murphys in goal there’s a good chance Kilkenny will only lose by five points,” noted some GAA pundits.