What We Know About The Drone Attack On The Kremlin
SPECULATION, RUMOUR and misinformation is rife across the internet in the wake of footage showing two drones exploding over the Kremlin.
It’s hard to know who to believe and find information you can trust which is where WWN and its unerring dedication to the truth comes in.
Here’s what we know and what we’ve been able to verify:
This is a weird way for the Vatican to announce a new pope.
“Everybody knows Putin is a huge stargazing fan and spends his nights on top of that dome, this was clearly an assassination attempt” confirmed a Russian official, who also confirmed the drone was carrying 18 nuclear bombs.
In intercepted communications heard by WWN, Russian security forces on the ground labeled the attack ‘very mean’ and can be heard crying.
In addition to a drone hitting a Russian flag flying over the Kremlin, leaks from Ukraine intelligence indicated they are planning to leave Putin’s TV stuck on Ru Paul’s Drag Race and will fill his shower head with rainbow glitter.
“Like we need an excuse to commit heinous war crimes in a foreign land” said one Russian official, denying the drone was a false flag attack.
Putin has appealed to the International Criminal Court to charge Zelensky under crimes against flag pole.
The Kremlin confirmed it isn’t that Moscow’s air defence system is made of straw and wasn’t working it’s that it was on a well-earned day off.
Putin has been on the phone all day with his insurance company.
Jealous US officials watched on with envy stating they wish they had thought of this when fabricating reasons to invade Iraq back in 2003.
It was a rare quadruple-false flag operation launched by Putin to make it look like he fake planned the fake attack planned by Ukraine which was fake planned by Russia. At least according to one lad we spoke to down the gym.
Russian authorities are looking into whether a bored Steven Seagal fell asleep while playing with his drones.
Given the quantity of plastic surgery he has had on his face, a Ukrainian drone operative mistook the large round dome surface of the building for Putin’s face.
If it is a false flag attack, it is a clear sign that Putin is losing his touch since his days of killing 307 of his own citizens in the 1999 Russian apartment bombings he used as a pretext to launching the Chechen War.
Somewhere there is an Irish drone enthusiast who is keeping quiet about losing sight of his drone in high winds above Gort.
Dublin Airport security not looking so bad now in comparison, is it?
“Cancel culture gone mad,” said Putin, “can’t even massacre children, kidnap thousands more, dig mass graves and bomb hospitals without someone trying to lightly singe a flag”.