Other Than Hello, Everything Man Said In Job Interview Pure Waffle

IF spoofing was a job, Waterford man Kenneth Penreth would be a prime candidate thanks to the all-time hall-of-fame-worth waffling he just pulled off in his latest interview.

Penreth was applying for a position in a profession he has little to no expertise in, competing for a salary way in excess of anything he could possibly expect, but you wouldn’t have been able to tell from his cool demeanour and zen-like navigation of the questions posed by the two people interviewing him over the course of the hour-long process.

The 32-year-old was questioned about many elements of his CV, some of which he had only made up earlier this morning, and was himself surprised at how comfortably he can lie directly to people’s faces while sitting in a suit he had to borrow from a friend just to wear here today.

“Even if I don’t get the job, I’m impressed with myself,” said Penreth, who went straight to the pub after his 1pm interview to help ease his frazzled nerves.

“The way I look at it is this, it’s a job interview, not court. I’m not under oath. Nobody ever perjured themselves at one of these things. So what if I made up everything except my name and home address? Do you really think these guys go back through your files to check how you did in the Leaving Cert? Just tell them you have the skills they need and your ambition is to be the best damn whatever-this-is in the world, and if they employ you then it’s on them”.

Penreth’s approach to being interviewed has lead many to question why indeed they bothered to tell the truth during job interviews, and wonder if they had just made up some bullshit answer to ‘where they see themselves in 5 years’ they’d actually be working somewhere they liked.