Taking Up Hurling & Other Ways To Get Your Debt Written Down
“SHITE, I’ve only a runners up Sigerson Cup medal”: the words of a low level AIB customer seeking to come to an agreement on their mortgage debt having fallen behind on repayments.
The man, a complete fool, was under the impression the majority of his debt would be forgiven thanks to his middling-at-best GAA career. WWN Finance is here to dispel the myths around Irish banking, GAA culture and debt write offs.
If you want a debt of €9.5mn written down by somewhere in the region of 99.6% you’re going to need to do the following:
Take up hurling.
And be one of the best to ever play the game.
Sadly, they are no other alternatives. If you have the reflexes of toddler in a straight jacket suffering from vertigo, that debt will have to be paid off.
However, Irish banks have informed us that if you were to take up hurling and became an all-time great it would be rendered pointless if you had a Mica affected house in Donegal because as is the case in 2023 for those families – the banks will be chasing you for every penny.
‘Surely it can’t be that easy’ you say? Okay, we did leave out some small details, the bank officials who agreed to the write down will be hauled before an Oireachtas committee for a particularly relaxing back rub.
AIB have clarified that exceptionally gifted handball players will get a max of 23% of total written off while League of Ireland soccer players will be laughed out of their local branch.
UPDATE: DJ Carey isn’t the only hurling great to be the source of controversy as it has been sensationally revealed that Cork great Christy Ring used to always get the biggest communion wafer at Sunday Mass while Joe Canning got an extra flake in his 99s from one Galway newsagents.