Plane Tracker Shows Elon Musk’s Current Location


ELON MUSK has once again been on the receiving end of sympathy and support after heartless Twitter users shared the current location of his plane using publicly available information relating to planes and flight paths.

Images circulated by several accounts revealed Musk’s current location to be somewhere up his own asshole, but what seems like harmless information to some can actually be deadly in the wrong hands.

“It’s a security risk to my personal safety,” Musk said, his voice echoing in the deep cavernous recesses of his anus.

“If bad faith actors were to known my current flight path trajectory is my own poop shoot – just think what they could do with that information. At the end of the day people are just jealous it’s my head up my own ass and not theirs”.

Musk has taken to banning the ElonJet account from Twitter which shared the plane’s location as well as accounts belonging to a number of journalists who reported on the story.

“We’ve updated our T&Cs to make sharing an individual’s live location a ban worthy offence,” explained one Twitter spokesperson.

“So to answer your question no it is perfectly within the rules to state his previous locations like ‘in Jeffrey Epstein’s house’, ‘his father’s emerald mine’, ‘at Tesla’s Fremont factory which is subject to sexual harassment cases and had a $137mn judgement against it in favour of a worker who was subjected to racism’ and ‘on a massage table allegedly asking an employee for a happy ending in exchange for a horse’.”

UPDATE: Thousands of Musk fans have defended the billionaire and stated that his current cries of ‘help I’m stuck’ are the work of a genius and not clear evidence his head is permanently stuck up his own ass.