Twitter Staff Tell Musk To Leave Giant Plug Alone, Just Stop Thinking About It


DESPITE the best efforts of Twitter’s remaining engineers, new owner Elon Musk has discovered the giant plug that connects the social media network to the internet and just will not stop fidgeting with the damned thing.

“Mr. Musk. Elon, friend. Buddy. Just leave it be, man, it’s nothing you need to worry about,” pleaded one programmer as Musk hovered over the connection, poking it with the leg of a chair.

Stressing that he ‘just wanted to see how it joined the wall’ Musk was lead away to a hastily-convened ‘important meeting’ to give staff enough time to find a tarp or a blanket or something to cover the plug and cable in the hopes that the billionaire would just forget it was there.

“He’s absolutely gutted the staff andfired people who he badly needed without even thinking about what it would do to the site, and now he’s obsessed with the one cable that keeps the freakin’ lights on around here,” sighed one executive, who as per Musk’s demands has divorced his wife and now lives in Twitter HQ.

Our interview was interrupted by a screwdriver-wielding Musk who demanded to be taken to the plug, insisting that although he had only just heard about it minutes ago he knows a better way to make it work.