Hellraiser 2022 Review: Even Demons Are Woke Now

IN YET another blatant example of the radical left’s ongoing crusade to turn our children into an army of sexually confused perverts via the woke-ification of their favourite movies and TV shows, the new Hellraiser movie now features a transgender demon, because of course it does, writes WWN inhouse movie critic, Larry Gorman.

What effect will this have on little David and little Maisy when they sit down to watch an updated version of Clive Barker’s psychosexual sadomasochistic horror opus and find that the main coenobite Pinhead ‘identifies’ as a female despite being assigned male at birth? It’s a thought more terrifying than the movie itself.

However, in a blow to ‘Wokeywood’, parents in their droves are opting to simply not let their kids watch the blood-soaked nightmare. So there goes that revenue stream, Hulu! Go woke go broke, idiots!

The suggestion coming from the right is to show your kids some older 18-rated horror movies, such as the original Hellraiser or Nightmare on Elm Street, from back in the good old days when men were men, and you could use the F-word to describe homosexuals freely in dialogue.

Other than that, the new Hellraiser is probably okay. It’s not available over here just yet, so we haven’t had the chance to review it properly. We just saw the words ‘trans actress’ and that was enough for us. Like, what’s next; A Short Circuit remake with ‘Jeannie Five’? Is nothing sacred anymore?!