ROCKSTAR GAMES have confirmed that leaked gameplay footage for Grand Theft Auto 6 is in fact genuine and will be less unhinged and deranged than America in its current state.
Once famed for its satirical slant on contemporary American life Rockstar have apologised to GTA fans disappointed by the initial leaks depicting Miami stand-in Vice City and vowed to do better.
“Bank jobs and police brutality just doesn’t cut it anymore in a world of QAnon, Musk-is-the-Messiah, gun violence, 13-year-old rape victims forced to give birth madness,” explained one Rockstar spokesperson who said developers and writers were working around the clock to ensure the gonzo world of insanity they depicted in the upcoming game could outpace the insanity of American society in 2022.
“Every time we introduced a layer of craziness we hadn’t reached in a previous game, reality outdid us,” said spokesperson of game scenarios Rockstar had to scrap after they actually happened in real life.
“Whether its politicians leading people in fascist salutes, a man getting surgery to replace his dick with the head of an alligator or a woman marrying Splash Mountain – whatever the writers came up during production started occurring in real time”.
“The quadriplegic male prostitute in hentai cosplay selling himself for Dogecoin on the street is frankly uninspired when compared to when I look out my window,” said one unhappy GTA fan, as he looked out at his KKK robe wearing uncle overdosing on adrenachrome while impaling himself on a burning cross because a TikTok trend told him to.
“A gun that shoots Supreme Court Justices at female characters… yawn”.
Elsewhere, the person responsible for the leak is believed to have set a new record for the number of wanted level stars.
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