Uber Joins Facebook, Hugo Boss & Lockheed Martin In List Of Companies Local Man Expected More Of


THE FALLOUT from the Uber leaks which detailed a trail of underhanded lobbying and potential law breaking has left local aspiring entrepreneur and serial LinkedIn status updater Devin O’Loughlan shook to his very core.

“That’s really out of character for the sort of market disruptors I’ve come to know and love,” remarked the ambitious and driven O’Loughlan, who had previously always sided with Uber and its contemporaries in all their flagrantly malignant and amoral forays into new markets.

O’Loughlan, who normally never goes more than a week without posting an inspirational business quote from Steve Jobs, has struggled greatly with the Uber scandal forcing him to reevaluate how willing he is to swallow branding BS from large multinationals with a horrible track record in literally everything.

“Enron, Shell, Nestle, Hugo Boss; I’ve been burnt in the past. It’s a short list, I know, and it goes to show we live in a golden age of responsible businesses adhering to the law when behaviour like that displayed by Uber is so rare,” added the call centre manager.

O’Loughlan immediately changed his tune upon learning the whistleblower at the centre of the leaks was Irish.

“God, how embarrassing. He’s not helping our business rep abroad. I mean he spearheaded a lot of the dodgy lobbying – fairplay, but it’s very much a no-no in US business culture to have a conscience, he’s making us look ridiculous,” concluded O’Loughlan before changing his title on LinkedIn so it sounded like he has received a promotion of some kind.

Meanwhile, amid the fallout from the lobbying scandal the Irish government affirmed its commitment to make it harder for the public to learn about what goes on behind closed doors with multi-national companies.