Orange Order Parade Not Playing On Your TV? Here’s Where You Can Stream It

BBC Northern Ireland have decided not to air the annual 12th of July Orange Order marches from around the province this year, leaving many loyal Loyalists (and indeed other generic parade enthusiasts) with the following options when it comes to hearing the sweet sound of a lambeg drum and feeling the tension of sectarian provocation.

1) Attend a parade in person

Why watch an Orange march on TV when you can attend in person? Hear the fifes play! Listen to the crowds roar! Feel the heat from the petrol bombs that get thrown when older members of each community egg on their younger folk! Hear sectarian chants that you’ve never heard before, to the tune of pop songs that you will never hum in their original versions again! Live the emotions!

2) Watch it on CCTV

After BBC Northern Ireland refused to show the Orange parades, most streaming sites were quick to express absolutely zero interest in picking them up. Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, Disney+, even the RTE Player all passed. But if you would like to see the parades on a screen, head to any business on the parade route and ask if you can watch it on their CCTV monitors, along with their nervous-looking security staff. You might want to not wear your Celtic jersey, though.

3) It’ll be on the news later

If you can stand to miss it live, then just wait until the 9 o’clock news when you’ll be able to see all of the highlights! The marching, the piping, the sashes, the bubbling hatred that’s holding Northern Ireland back by generations. All from the comfort of your own home (although you and your family will miss out on being called Fenian bastards). Failing that, Arlene Foster is showing it live on her GB News show, but only nine people are allowed watch at any time without their server crashing, so probably best avoid that.