Twitter Accuses Musk Of Withholding Data About Offering Woman Horse In Exchange For ‘Erotic Massage’
IN THE WAKE of Elon Musk attempting to back out of his deal to acquire Twitter citing a lack of satisfaction around the user data disclosed by the social media company, Twitter have raised their own concerns WWN Tech can reveal.
“Nevermind Twitter bot numbers, eh, when were you going to tell us you’re a free speech champion who also gets employees to sign an NDA when you whip out your little boring tunnel and ask them for a happy ending?” one Twitter board member asked Musk, now that they’re on the subject of withholding important information.
“It would have been very cool to have disclosed the fact he allegedly paid an employee $250,000 in exchange for silence after exposing his penis to her,” added a Twitter shareholder who was now offering to buy Musk a horse in exchange for just shutting up for two seconds.
A rare genius businessman, Musk’s most recent innovation has been to tank both Tesla and Twitter stock while cutting an embarrassing and desperate figure in tweets.
“No, I’m glad we know all this now, it’s finally starting to make sense; of course only an idiot who innovated the ‘look my penis, touch penis, I buy you horse’ form of harassment could think buying this hellsite I’ve invested in was a good idea,” confirmed another Twitter shareholder.
Sadly such is the recent dive in Tesla stock price, in the future Musk will only be able to offer employees a hamster in exchange for sex.
Elsewhere, a new survey revealed that 100% of people said if they were the richest person in the world they would simply not spend day-in, day-out making a complete tit of themselves on Twitter and heaping fresh humiliation on themselves.