“Yes You Can Have Citizens Assembly On Neutrality” Taoiseach Tells Nation That Asked For One On Drugs


AFTER YEARS of steadfast campaigning by charities, advocates, former drug users and experts, the government recently delayed the citizens assembly on drugs to the specific date of ‘dunno when’, as clearly requested by the public, WWN can confirm.

“And not only that, we’ve been overwhelmed by the loud calls for a referendum on neutrality so we’re fast tracking an assembly on that instead because you explicitly asked,” confirmed Taoiseach Micheál Martin.

Highlighting how much the world has changed in recent weeks, not to the extent that there’s a need to honour commitments on an assembly on drugs, the Taoiseach added that with millions of Irish people protesting day-in and day-out demanding the right to die in wars he had little choice but must act.

“You asked that we look into whether criminalising and stigmatising addicts while ignoring best rehabilitation practice could be damaging and to investigate if there was another way, and we listened – hence the push for a neutrality debate,” added the Taoiseach conjuring up the public’s desire to have 16-year-old conscripts die in future unnamed wars from thin air.

“With drug related deaths up 225%, prosecution up 484% and cocaine use up by 10,376% over a 25 year period it’s never been more important to kick the can down the road on this to take a closer look at whether we should join the Military Alliance For Carpet Bombing Civilians in the next decade,” added an expert in the 573rd radio and TV debate on neutrality in the last 24 hours.

In a survey of the public 85% of unfit readers of WWII historical fiction confirmed they’d be very interested in exploring the idea of sending people off to die while only 5% declared any interest in saving lives of drug addicts through improvement to public policy.