Waterford Woman Contracts ​Conjunctivitis In Her Third Eye

A COUNTY Waterford woman has become the first known human in history to contract pink eye in her third eye and is currently being treated with a new experimental therapy in Dublin, WWN has learned.

Alison Cooley first noticed the condition late last year during a group meditation session when she felt the overwhelming urge to scratch a deep set irritation in the middle of her brain.

Following four weeks of unbearable itching that she could not alleviate, the 34-year-old underwent several MRI and sonar scans to source the route of the problem, only for doctors to find a slight swelling and pink discoloration on her pineal gland.

“Not being able to scratch my third eye was agony,” the woke daughter of two recalled. “I noticed my vibrations were off too, and my chakras were all over the place so when I found out it was only a viral infection in my third eye I was somewhat relieved”.

Ms. Cooley’s third eye has since cleared up after surgeons performed a keyhole brain surgery which carefully navigated through her head and rubbed anti bacterial cream onto the surface of her third eye, however, two more people from her yoga class have also since contracted the infection.

“Pink eye is very contagious and we believe the other patients must have contracted it while meditating with Ms Cooley as all their vibrations harmonised together,” a doctor concluded.