Exhausted British Voters Quit British Politics


RESPONDING to the news 8 Labours MPs and 3 Tory MPs have quit their parties to form the Independent Group adding to the already considerable chaos, exhausted Britons have thrown their hands up in the air and quit British politics.

“I didn’t know we could quit. Brilliant,” confirmed one Briton who was flummoxed by the thought that some now former Labour and Tory MPs felt what the country needed at this particular point in time was more upheaval and grandstanding at the expense of the ordinary people.

The defecting MPs voiced their frustrations at the direction and leadership of their parties which ultimately led them to quit, much to the bemusement of British voters.

“A bit pissed off at Labour and the Conservatives were they? I’m trying to imagine that must feel like; to think the two big parties are completely fucking useless but really I’m struggling,” confirmed another voter who may have been sarcastic in their response.

“Yeah quit now with 30-odd days until Brexit. Very helpful and well timed. Would have been pointless to do it 2 years ago, or in the case of the Tories, 30 years ago. Thanks guys”.

With the clock ticking down on Brexit and little evidence their politicians will suddenly turn into cogent, capable public representatives, British voters have confirmed “sod this, we’re not doing this anymore”.

“They want to quit their fucking parties after getting us in this mess? Nice one. We’re fucking quitting politics altogether, you steaming basket of cock wotsits,” an irate Briton concluded before flicking on news to see Theresa May give a speech about what a storming success Brexit is.