Ship Sinks After Striking Giant Carlsberg In Middle Of Arctic Ocean

RESCUE boats are scrambling to save the lives of the crew of the Sea Nymph research vessel after the boat struck a giant Carlsberg in waters not far from Prince Patrick Island in the Arctic Ocean.

An SOS message was relayed in the early hours of yesterday morning, with the final message from the captain of the Sea Nymph distorted and hard to hear amidst the sound of ship taking on vast amounts of water.

“Of the little we could hear he seemed to being saying ‘where the fuck did that giant Carlsberg come from?’ Safe to say it took them all by surprise,” one crew member working on a rescue boat shared with WWN as the search for survivors continued.

Fragments of the boat have already washed up onshore nearby suggesting the boat could have been ripped apart by the impact. Closer study of the giant Carlsberg show it did not emerge unscathed either form the collision, with a visible opening in one section of it, beer clearly seen to be flooding out from it and into the ocean.

“The Carlsberg seems from a distance to be of no great size, but its vastness reveals itself under the ocean, the Sea Nymph didn’t stand a chance,” added the rescue boat crew member.

In the recent hours, opportunists have been seen rowing towards the Carlsberg on make shift floats in a bid to plug the hole in the Carlsberg with their mouths.