2 Billionth Facebook User Spends First Evening Online ‘Poking’ Friends


AN Irishman who became Facebook’s 2 billionth member yesterday morning has confirmed that he has spent the majority of his short time on the social network “poking friends”, and looks forward to being a part of the world’s biggest online community.

Martin Brophy, (59), who admitted to once calling Facebook a load of old rubbish, said he decided to bite the bullet and set up a Facebook on Sunday after years of suggestions from friends and family members.

“I tried to keep it on the QT,” he explained, “but little did I know I would be all over the news for being the 2 billionth user”.

Brophy received a Facebook alert shortly after confirming his account, and was awarded a staggering three thousand free likes on his first ever post as a gift from the company.

“If I had to have known my first post on a friend’s wall asking ‘how do I send a private message, John, is this private. I don’t get this thing at all’ was going to get all those likes, I would have come up with a better one,” he added, now scrolling through old school friends and poking them.

“To be honest, I’ve spent most of my time poking friends, but no one seems to be poking me back,” he said.

Brophy also complained that friends were not unlocking new items for him in Zenga poker, and that people seem to be ignoring his FarmVille requests.

‘Guys, can someone please unlock my Tractor when you get a chance’ he wrote in his second Facebook post at 11:52pm last night, before then posting an array of early morning YouTube music videos of his liking.