Daniel Day Lewis To Play Man Who Quits Acting In New Movie


GREAT news for Daniel Day Lewis fans as the actor announced his retirement from acting in a bid to prepare for a role in a movie in which he plays an actor who quits the profession.

Preemptively nominated for an Oscar immediately after the news broke, for what will presumably be a tour de force performance that exposes the brutal wreckage of the human experience, Day Lewis revealed through his publicist that now was the time to exit stage left.

“Daniel is a committed actor, of course, bound to the method so when he got the part as a retired actor he had no choice but to quit,” explained a source close to the actor.

In order to prepare for the gruelling role, it is believed Day Lewis will sit on the couch most mornings watching Jeremy Kyle, staying put through the afternoon until Countdown is over.

Additional method acting Day Lewis will seek to employ will involve the 3-time Oscar winner going on the dole and propping up his local bar, drunkenly claiming to regulars that he is Gerry Conlon, Daniel Plainview or Bill the Butcher.

While details surrounding his next Oscar winning role have been few and far between, with no writer or director yet attached, the movie I Quit Acting is expected for release sometime in 2040.