Trump Threatens To Pull America Out Of US Constitution


IN YET another controversial move by the US leader, President Donald Trump has announced he is to sign an executive order to pull America out of its own constitution in a bid to “destroy any more obstacles” that may hinder his future policies.

Mr. Trump took to twitter late last night to break to news, stating that the current constitution, which was drafted over 226 years ago by the founding fathers, was outdated and annoying.

“The constantution (sic) is old, boring and just getting in the way of my progress,” Trump tweeted without any help from anyone, “too many sections. Very long winded. I’ll get Jared (Kushner) on it tomorrow. He’ll do a great great job”.

“We have to take America out of the constantution (sic). It’s a terrible deal, the worst. We can negotiate a better deal once we’re out of it,” Trump added, in a tweet posted at 4.14am.

At this moment little is known about what changes will be implemented in the American constitution as part of Trump led negotiations with the text. However, sources inside his administration have hinted at an outright ban on Islam throughout the 50 states, with a complete overhaul of the first amendment, which also allows free speech among the press and US citizens, enabling for the long sought American dream of having Trump’s feeling protected by law.

“Donnie is adamant about getting rid of the whole free speech thing,” said one source, “he also wanted to get rid of Congress, but of course that wouldn’t be possible under the current democratic system, so he plans to change that too”.

In response to criticism that trampling on the much venerated constitution and its signatories was a step too far, Trump labeled the founding fathers ‘losers’ and confirmed in another tweet that he had not ruled out writing his own ‘Constantinople’.