Prince William Demands €1.5m For Topless Kate Photos, €3m For Full Frontal

THE Duke of Cambridge has demanded €1.5m for topless photographs of his wife Kate, adding that full frontal photographs would be €3m, if paparazzi are interested.

In a statement read to a court in Paris, where six people are on trial in connection with the alleged breach of privacy, Prince William branded the decision to publish topless photographs of his wife without paying for them first as “particularly shocking”, but insisted he is open to a conversation about “other photographs he has”.

“You can barely see anything in those pictures and Kate wasn’t even ready at the time,” said the statement written by William, who earns £3 million a year in state benefits, “I’ve got some real crackers on my phone where her tits look all nice and firm, and she’s lying on the bed,” insisting, “she was caught on a bad day that time in France, okay? That’s why I’m only charging £1.5 million for those ones, but if ye want better ones it will cost double that amount”.

The grainy long-lens images, taken as the couple holidayed in the south of France, were published on the front and inside pages of France’s Closer magazine in September 2012, sparking outrage among the Royal family over ongoing privacy issues.

“I can also do a deal on five photographs for ten million,” the statement added, “Phoooar, if you guys could see these now, you’d take the hand and all off me. She’s a fit bird, my Kate, and I will not have any newspaper publishing such terrible pictures of her topless, and if I’m honest – slightly out of shape. They don’t do her justice. And when I say full frontal, I mean it”.

The verdict for the defendants, who are facing criminal charges of invasion of privacy and complicity, is expected next week.