Now THAT’S Leadership! Dáil Debates Motion To Stand For Daily Prayer!


AT A PRECARIOUS time in the history of the Irish State as nascent Brexit negotiations remain prickly, and Ireland’s economic future seems unclear, the Dáil has delivered on its promise to represent and legislate for the concerns, needs and wants of Irish society by debating whether TDs should be forced to stand for a prayer.

“Everybody knows a Hail Mary doesn’t work if you’re seated,” shared someone with expertise in the field of positional prayer-effectiveness, who went on to praise those involved in pushing this issue to the forefront of the Dáil’s agenda.

Fine Gael TD and Minister for Health Protection, Marcella Corcoran Kennedy, introduced an amendment to a standing order which requires TDs to observe a daily prayer in the chamber. Taking the sort of decisive action and leadership lacking in the Dáil recently, the Fine Gael TD proposed making it compulsory to stand during the prayer and institute an additional 30 seconds for ‘silent reflection’.

An act that many have commended for the clear, strong leadership the country is in desperate need of.

“Ah, it’s great to see, here’s a TD who has nothing going on in her department. Like, there’s no pressing issues in regards to health in Ireland. None. I mean, go on try and think of one, see you can’t. And it’s a terrible waste of her talents, so it’s good to see she’s keeping herself busy with important stuff like this,” shared one Dáil colleague, who was getting sick of debating nonsense like housing and health.

There has been some consternation among some more conservative TDs that the amendment stops short of requiring the Dáil to be blessed by the Pope on a daily basis.

“Everyone is laughing at us now, and hope the TDs are fucking happy. A debate on a prayer and they’re extending the silent reflection to 30 seconds. Has this country gone mental? It should be a minimum of 60 seconds,” shared an irate member of the public who is sick of the pathetic efforts put forth by public representatives.