Wenger To Be Given One Last Chance At Zipping Up Giant Coat Before Being Sacked


DESPITE a humiliating 5-1 loss to Bayern Munich last night, Arsene Wenger will be allowed one final chance to save his job this week at Arsenal’s training ground, WWN has learned.

Sources close to the club have suggested that the Arsenal hierarchy’s faith in the club’s manager of 20 years is now at an all time low, but the Frenchman could be redeemed if he successfully zips up his trademark coat.

If Wenger was to emerge triumphant in his battle with the coat, it would be the first time in 14 years he has done so and would allow him to prove doubters wrong about the stagnant status of Arsenal.

“This could be a turning point, we’ll have turned a corner and can kick on from here,” said one fan for 3,445th time this century, adding “we should back him,” hinting he has faith in the manager to meekly drag Arsenal to yet another 4th place trophy.

However, sources close to the club remain doubtful.

“He’s been pulling away at it all morning, but it’s not looking good. That zip is more stubborn than Arsene’s resolve when it comes to indulging Ozil,” shared one ex-player, who thinks Wenger’s days are numbered.

Elsewhere, ambulances were called to the Allianz Arena last as countless Arsenal Fan TV contributors burst blood vessels and suffered heart attacks as they attempted to appear more outraged than one another at their team’s anemic display.