Man Actually Believes Girlfriend When She Says She Doesn’t Think About Jamie Dornan During Sex


A WATERFORD woman has done the impossible and convinced her boyfriend of 7 years that she does not retreat into fantasies of being ravaged by Jamie Dornan while they engage in intercourse, WWN has learned.

Lismore local Rachel Healy confirmed to her partner David Griffin that the broad shoulders, flawless face and puddle-inducing abs of Northern Irish heartthrob Dornan have not crossed her mind in recent weeks, despite the heavy press promotion around the 50 Shades of Grey sequel, 50 Shades Darker.

“Babe, why would I be thinking of his unbelievable body when I can nestle my head against your formless heap of a beer belly, come on, don’t be silly,” Healy explained to Griffin, contradicting her recent flurry of private google searches which have included ‘Jamie Dornan underwear’, ‘Jamie Dornan 50 shades sex scenes’, ‘Jamie Dornan opening really hard to open jar of jam’ and ‘Jamie Dornan working out’.

Relationship experts remain impressed by Healy’s ability to convince Griffin, obviously an idiot, that his girlfriend is very much focused on him and only him during what Griffin has dubbed as ‘sexy time’.

“It’s astonishing really, he must know that Healy isn’t getting off on the fact he can only 3, 4 push ups max before collapsing in a heap and she hid the fact she called him ‘Jamie’ multiple times quite well. She is a marvel really,” explained couple expert Martin Drury.

Griffin remains oblivious to Healy’s flights of fancy despite his girlfriend insisting he speak with a ‘Nordie accent’ during their last sexual encounter. It is believed Healy will soon begin watching footage of Dornan’s torso on her laptop over the shoulder of Griffin.