America’s Problem Now Officially The World’s Problem


WITH the official ushering in of Donald Trump as president of the United States of America, citizens of the world have taken a break from joyously ridiculing the stupidity of the American public after realising their act of self-destruction is now the world’s problem.

All the worry, anxiety and palpable fear that many Americans have expressed in the aftermath of Trump’s successful run for the presidency could slowly become a more present feature among non-Americans, in non-American countries once the sense that America’s problem has now officially become the world’s problem too.

“It’s great to have the America back that we all know and love, you know the one we can feel morally superior too, because they’ve a clinically insane and stupid lad in charge, but I don’t remember feeling this scared about it when George W Bush was in charge,” confirmed non-American Ambrose Delahunt, “oh so this is what watching on helplessly felt like for Democrats, I get it now”.

With President Trump the man now tasked with running the country, America’s domestic and foreign policy can and will change depending on what YouTube conspiracy video he has watched before going to bed each night, sparking the realisation among non-Americans that the next 4 years won’t be as enjoyable as the pastime of passively watching and laughing at the US election turned out to be.

“It was great for a while, laughing at how thick those idiots who voted for him were, but it’s not really funny anymore. Kinda shitting myself, if I’m being honest,” shared Tommy Smith, resident of North America and keen supporter of the world not ending in nuclear war.

Some Americans have welcomed the rest of the world into the hellish nightmare they call reality.

“Not so funny now, is it? Welcome to the party,” admitted a glum looking New York native Juan Fernandez.