Trump Promises To Just Look At Nukes, Not Launch Them


“I JUST want to see the button, ok? That’s what I do, I just look at buttons, I don’t touch them. Check the records, I’m the best at looking at buttons without touching them,” said Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump earlier this week, amid concerns that the billionaire could be eager to launch nuclear weapons should he achieve his goal of presidency in the upcoming US election.

“Guys, you know me, you know I’m a businessman, OK? And in business, you just have to know what buttons are there, and what they look like” added Trump, midway through a debate on healthcare.

“That’s all. I’m not saying I would push the button and launch nuclear weapons, come on. That’s not me. Ask anybody. I’m the best at not nuking other countries. The. Best. Nobody doesn’t nuke other countries the way I don’t”

“It’s not even a contest. But yeah, I’m going to need to see that button. Just look at it. You can put a big ‘do not touch’ sticker on it. Go ahead. I won’t touch it”.

Trump’s insistence that he won’t touch the button was met with concern from all sides, including one man who witnessed Trump in 2008 deliberately touching a freshly painted wall despite it clearly being signposted as “Wet Paint”.