Guy Next To You In Toilet Cubicle Definitely Skinning Up

THE guy in the cubicle next to yours is definitely skinning up a fat one, the rustling of Rizla papers has revealed.

During a lull period in your bowel movement, the suspicious sound can only be from someone frantically sticking skins together, despite their pathetic attempt to cover up with a forced cough.

“Maybe I’m mistaking the sound for toilet paper,” you tell yourself, scouring the air with your nose for that unmistakable scent of herb. “But these are the annoying dispensers that make a particular sound, you know, the ones that only give one sheet at a time from a tiny little hole”, debunking your whole toilet paper theory.

“He’s listening now, waiting for me to make a noise,” you determine.

Desperate for some more clues, your eyes catch the part-reflection of an elbow on the shiny tiles below the cubicle gap, revealing an arm stance that can only be from someone balancing something on their lap, like a half-made joint.

Now flushing your toilet, the suspect next door takes the opportunity to finish making his spliff, quickly rolling and licking the gummed leaf while the water swallows your excrement whole.

Upon washing your hands, the suspect opens the door, quickly bypassing you and the hand basin for the nearest exit, proving you right all along, you perceptive bastard you.