Local Man Suspicious Of Fact He’s Never Seen A Baby Pigeon

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LOCAL man Ciaran Shanley has launched a one man investigation into the fact that, now that he thinks about it, he’s never seen a baby pigeon.

Speaking to WWN from Waterford city quays as he chased several pigeons, the 32-year-old was adamant there was something sinister about the lack of young pigeons in the country’s skies and on the country’s streets.

“D’ya not think it’s a little weird… I’d ask, where are they? Have you ever seen one yourself boi? I’m not saying there’s some worldwide pigeon conspiracy perpetrated by governments of the world, but you never know,” Shanley shared.

Shanley said his interest in the subject grew after asking almost everyone he has ever come into contact with if they had seen a prepubescent, baby or adolescent pigeon.

“No one has, it’s weird,” Shanley added as he managed to clutch a fully grown pigeon, who he then interrogated.

“Where are your children? Did you sell them to some pigeon pedophile ring? Answer me,” the deranged Shanley screamed in a controlled and inquisitive manner befitting a man who now dedicates his life to finding out if baby pigeons even exist.

It was put to Shanley by WWN that perhaps infant pigeons remain in their nests, out of the reach and view of humankind, until fully grown but our claims were rubbished.

“That’s what they want you to think,” Shanley said as he ran after a fresh cluster of adult pigeons.

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