We Speak To The One Child In Ireland Not Abused By Powerful Irish Institutions


IRELAND, famed the world over for being the best little country in the world, has in the past had a rather checkered record when it comes to safeguarding children from powerful institutions such as the Church and various apparatuses of the State.

Despite a laissez faire attitude in the Ireland establishment to ensuring children could grow up without experiencing untold horrors, WWN has, after years of searching tracked down the one and only child who avoided all manner of mental, physical and sexual abuse while interacting with those very institutions entrusted with protecting him.

“Survivor’s guilt doesn’t even begin to cover it,” 17-year-old Gary Hubbard explained to WWN from one of the few foster homes in the country that local authorities can be fairly certain of and safely say they know has not mistreated the children that pass through its doors.

“I hadn’t a clue that I was literally the lucky one until everyone told me. I was an altar boy, went swimming regularly in the local pool, and thankfully I’m a bloke and that bit too young for the Magdalene crowd to have got their claws into me,” Gary explained, in a manner which seemed to confirm his childhood was not completely eviscerated by anyone abusing their position of power.

“I was in foster care for about two years, and I dunno, luck was on my side or something, because I wasn’t bounced around too many homes and all those inefficiencies and shortcomings in the system sort of missed me. I did feel a bit left out though as all the other kids I talked to had these horror stories,” Gary added.

Expert opinion has revealed that Gary is so lucky in fact that statistically, he was more likely to win the Euro Millions jackpot 17 times than he was to have passed through Irish institutions unscathed.

“I mean, I took a turn when I was about 13 and I ended up in psychiatric ward for several months, but I wasn’t put into the adult ward like all the other kids, I had a specially dedicated environment befitting a child which I hear just doesn’t happen to everyone,” Gary, whose 18th birthday is only around the corner, added.

Gary also thanked politicians and police for not conspiring to covering up his murder, and for not even thinking of murdering him in the first.

“I didn’t die in police custody with questionable bruises on my body, I wasn’t murdered by a prominent pillar of the community before it was all covered up, I think I might be the luckiest child in Ireland,” Gary concluded.

The lucky teenager is expected to be turfed out of his foster home with little or no after support or care offered by the State once he does hit the big 1-8.