Stephen Fry Hospitalised With Twitter Withdrawal Symptoms

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FAMOUS man Stephen Fry has been admitted to a top London rehabilitation centre, after going into withdrawal shock following 24 hours without Twitter.

Fry quit the social media platform following an online storm surrounding an off-the-cuff remark he made at the BAFTAS on Sunday, where he referred to one winner as “looking like a bag lady”.

An incensed crowd of offendable people took to Twitter to tell him off, prompting Fry to delete his profile altogether and claim that he was “better off without this kind of bullshit”.

However, Fry, known as one of the most prolific and entertaining tweeters in the world, did not bank on the severe withdrawal symptoms that comes with a cold-turkey approach to quitting social media.

The 58-year-old began to speak in sentences of no more than 140 characters as he stared at the lock screen of his phone, while sweating profusely and rocking back and forth.

After he started saying ‘hashtag’ before every word, friends of Fry rushed him to the nearest hospital where he was evaluated and sent to rehab.

“You cannot just go from using Twitter constantly to not using it at all,” said Dr. Vikram McKenna, notification addiction specialist.

“You have to wean yourself off it gradually; instead of tweeting to thousands of people, send emails to close friends to take the edge off. Read tweets, but do not reply. Maybe sign up to LinkedIn or something. But don’t just screech to a halt. Your mind cannot cope with the sudden absence of people who you don’t know talking absolute garbage”.

Fry’s condition was said to have improved in the past few hours, as doctors administered a drip containing liquid RTs.

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